Summer Reading Roundup

Eek! summer is almost over. Clearly, I haven't read enough.
Hunger Games - Suzanne Collins - my new favorite book,
City of Ashes (Mortal Instruments trilogy) - Cassandra Clare - cousin love (aka incest)!
Wicked Prey (Lucas Davenport series) - John Sanford - political intrigue,
Zen and the Art of Vampires (Dark Ones)- Katie MacAlister - cute!
Finger Lickin Fifteen (Stephanie Plum series) - Janet Evanovich - exploding BBQs and farting,
New Moon - Stephanie Myers - 4th time!
Motor Mouth - also Janet Evanovich.

Too Much?

(modcloth)

Breaking Dawn

Confession - I just finished Breaking Dawn. I was very excited when it first came out, but the negative reviews were so immediate that I decided to hold off until after seeing the movie. I wanted to enjoy the movie with the excitement of someone who loooooves the series.

And, I loved Breaking Dawn! Yes, there are all sorts of issues - teen pregnancy, teen marriage, personal identity/independence and agency being at the forefront. I completely understand why lots of people are concerned - especially in light of shit like this.

But, from a purely romantic view-point, Breaking Dawn is completely swoony. Edward and Bella have perfect, unbreakable, forever love. What girl doesn't want perfect love that lasts forever?

Especially when it looks like this ... Le sigh.

Cover of the Week

Her Private Hell? To have to smash her naked breasts against cold ass glass while glancing away in a semi-erotic manner?


Good girl cover art.

Hot.

Twi-Excited

So I'm twi-excited for the opening of Twilight on Friday. Twons of squealing tweens, tweenagers and teens. I hope that I see the following:

1. Glitter eyeshadow
2. At least two girls applying lip gloss in the theater
3. More then three groups of six or more girls
4. Team Edward T-shirts

In October, girls invaded an Ohio mall and waited for hours for a glimpse of the ever dreamy Edward; and a huge brawl broke out - crazy, mad, wild mean girls.

So in short, my twi-dream is that Twilight will be awesome. Robin Sparkles, HIMYM, Let's go to the Mall awesome.

Period Drama

Does anyone else think more men might like period drama if we didn't call it period drama?

Honey, would you like to watch some period drama sounds about as appealing as - honey, would you enjoy sitting and watching something associated with menstrual cycles and bloody cunts?! Come on.

Tips for suggesting period drama to your man:

1. While fans of the genre know that miniseries (especially BBC miniseries) is its best format - try suggesting something with a run time of less than three hours.

2. Swords and horses are a good thing. Lots of dudes like fantasy and battles; and may, therefore, enjoy a good horse laden period romp.

3. Stick to traditional themes - e.g Arthurian Legend.

My current favorites are BBC Robin Hood and BBC North & South. Swoon and double swoon.

Romance is Hot Hot Hot

Bad News - the economy is in the shitter (and staying there). Good News - romance sales are up. I don't find it too surprising that in times of great turmoil, we go for the comforts of love and sex to feel happy and reassured.

Sites like eHarlequin - For women who Love to Read - provide an incredible amount of free content and an active online community. The varied Harlequin lines (Kimani Press, Silhouette, Mira, etc.) enable readers to quickly define, in a simply and fun way, the type of lover they wish or want to be. Interested in contemporary, christian characters facing the challenges of life and love - then Steeple Hill Inspired is the place for you. Are you a discerning woman looking for erotic stories of desire? Then go "ignite yourself" with the Spice line. Looking for a powerful, magical world you can only imagine - head on over to Luna and connect with your fellow magic lovers.

My favorite books are stand alone paranormals, but when reading series I like to be sparked by passion and fueled by desire - I'm a Silhouette Romantic Suspense gal.

Professionally, I try not to judge others reading habits - but personally, I must admit that the home & family lines creep me out. I'm sure I would find them a fine read, but the covers and titles weird me out:

Exhibit A:


Exhibit B:


Am I too biased? These are a little creepy, right?

F U in Your Mind Hole

As I continue on my paranormal romance journey - at times carefully navigating the alpha male/forced sexual encounter line - I've discovered the appeal of a certain trope of paranormal loving. Often the alpha male is so big (literally his giant penis is so big) or so scary or so strong that the heroine is afraid or timid and in order to woo her he must first come to her in her dreams, a.k.a f her in her mind hole. These dream encounters are so lovely and sensual that the heroine no longer fears his giant man (cock) and soon welcomes him in to her bed.

Oh baby you're so dreamy please do me in my dreams ...

Oh no, I could never say yes to you, unless you do me in my dreams ....

These fantasies skirt the line of rape (he's immortal and therefore willfully controlling her dream), but they also open the door for the heroine to release her inhibitions and give in to her desires - they find a way to appeal to the desire for capture, rescue, protection fantasies while simultaneously appealing to the desire for strong, sexy heroines. Is this trope troubling? Perhaps, depending on how it's written - but it can also be incredibly hot.

Bind and Serve

Did anyone else know there is a sub-genre of romance labeled "Capture and Bondage"? I particularly like this cover/title combo as it implies things that are neither quick nor easy.



And this week's cover of the week goes to Outlook Orgasmic. Bonus points for lewd use of childhood games. If only they could have covered his magic balls with the magic eight ball. Ahh to dream.



Read an excerpt here.

To Slut or Not To Slut

My least favorite bitches (the ladies of The View) had a mildly interesting debate on sluts today. What these ladies, and everyone else who's been obsessed with the topic lately, tend to be gleaning over is that slut remains one of the most gender biased terms in our lexicon - so whether you are pro-sex (yeah!) or anti-sex (boo!), let's start by acknowledging that the dictionary definition of slut remains:

1. a person, especially a woman, considered sexually promiscuous
2. a dirty, slovenly woman
3. an immoral or dissolute woman, a prostitute

While some may view sexual shaming as progress, and be excited by the idea that both boys and girls are currently being labeled as sluts - I simply see it as a disturbing progression of self and sexual loathing. I don't think we can ever divorce slut and gender bias. So while we may be evening the playing field, we are still implying boat loads of negativity on what should be seen as a natural and healthy progression.

Sex is good and fun and healthy and a natural part of life - and regardless of your personal views - can't we all just agree that it's never good to make young people feel bad about themselves and their bodies. Yes, I know some people think shame is a useful tool - but really, those people just suck.

Duck and Cover

While I've spent most of the past three days wishing I was at RWA (aka Romance Writers of America conference). I could not pass up this awesome new addition to romance. Move over puppies and dragons, it's DUCK TIME!

Changeling press has released the following e-short featuring "duck love". My only question is - where do we go from here? Of all the animal fetishes, I thought ducks would be pretty low on the totem pole.



"With her favorite dirty ditty playing through her mind, Mia’s shocked to see that her fine feathered friend has turned into a hard-bodied hunk worth quacking over. What the hell is she supposed to do now?" - read an excerpt here.

P.S. Am I the only one who, upon seeing the cover, immediately started singing the Ducktales theme?

Originally posted on the always awesome Smart Bitches/Trashy Books.

I'm not quite sure what to think here

Is she some sort of sexy human/dog cross breed? Why does she only have a tail? Is dog sex hot now?

Best use of bunny costume

Another contender for the Best. Cover. Ever.



Possible explanations for the bunny ears:
1. She's waaaay in to Easter
2. She has a hard-on for hare
3. He asked if they could do it like bunnies. She agreed, but had something else in mind.
4. Playboy Bunny 2.0
5. She's wadding in to furry waters

Heaven

Filling, pumping, fueling

Rumor has it someone is remaking I Dream of Jeannie. Fifties t.v. adaptations never really work on the big screen (Bewitched, The Beverly Hillbillies), so the question of the day is - is there an actor who could save this movie? I'm voting Hayden Panettiere. Yes she's a little young, but she's very attractive and can pull off doe-eyed with out looking dumb.

I've been reading J.R. Ward's Black Dagger Brotherhood series and while I absolutely love it - I must poke fun. I recently ran across some rather excellent romance phrasing. As the main characters' lovemaking progressed, he began - "pumping her, filling her ..." and __________ (you fill in the blank). All that came to my mind was fueling her?! Apparently reading newspapers can have an affect on your romance novel habit. I must now stave off the image of a dark, sticky vampire pumping her, filling her, fueling her ...

J. R. Ward's Black Dagger Brotherhood

www.jrward.com